About a date...

India woke up to the concept of dating quite a while ago. Thanks to the many channels of global influence, we found ourselves wanting to go on a ‘date’. Somehow this seemed to be the manliest achievement for the crowd still in between things in life. After fire, if there was one creation man was really proud of it had to be this – a date.

This did not really sink into my humble self up until I had passed my 18^th year of existence. Coming from a family with no female siblings my natural association with girls was not at its peak anyway. Being in a unisex crowd was hard enough but mustering the courage to actually ask a girl on a ‘date’ seemed a far fetched notion.

Certain ideas change definitions with location. The same happened with me as I traveled overseas. Back home, there was no such thing as walking into a bar and bumping into a girl there. For starters, the word ‘bar’ was always associated with a vice. The expression ‘Bar and Restaurant’ has a whole other story of its own. Needless to say the actual location of this so called ‘date’ was a tad askew. The next thing I noticed about the dating rituals here was that everything had a process. A guy was supposed to dress this way. A girl was supposed to say these words. He was supposed to pick her up and drop her off. A typical (read good kind) date was almost always in the evenings with a good chance of intimacy. A lot of excruciating details about this ritual seemed to emerge.

Back home, dating was nothing more than a movie and lunch. Of course the girl had to make sure no one saw her so she would have her dupatta (veil) around her head the whole time. I later realized that the only reason she would agree to a movie was because it was dark inside and so chances of her being ‘caught’ would be slim. Here the guy was pumping up his ego by thinking he had achieved something grand without realizing the girl is trying not to be seen with this fellow the whole time. Sad but true.

It has been a while since I have lived in India and maybe the concept of casual dating has indeed changed. Maybe it has become more like the western world after all. Reminds me of when I told my professor that I had to leave class early since I had a date. He responded with a naïve look ‘Today is the 12^th.’ I hope he now understands this concept better than I ever did.

--ShaKri